Working on me

I've struggled with my weight my whole life, I always was the big girl. It used to bother me, actually it drove me crazy. I was always the fat one and I had beautiful friends. They always had boyfriends and cute clothes and though I had other things to worry about then boys I still wanted cute clothes and because of my weight it was very hard for me to find them. I was often made of fun, even by those who were close to me and by people who I still dislike today. But, I learned to cope with it, I learned to let it go in one ear and out the other, I learned to turn my nose up at it and kept telling myself that as long as I was happy then they could deal with it.

I never really tried to lose weight in high school, I was too busy (We all say that, right?). Between basketball stats, band and sporting events, I felt I had no time to focus on my weight. After high school, I went to college and we all know about the famous Freshman 15, yeah well, I was a victim of it. In September of 2005, after being in the college for just a month or so, I broke my ankle and with all that stress of school, not being mobile for 6+ weeks, the weight poured on. I then moved to Seattle July of 2006 and was in a very  unhealthy relationship, an unstable home and ate fast food ALL THE TIME, I repeat, ALL THE TIME. The weight poured on again. To make a long story short, I'm now at the heaviest weight I can remember and I'm sick and tired of being fat and unhealthy.

If you read my blog, I've been trying to get my butt back in gear and go to the gym but we all know that with losing weight it's also about the diet. I feel like I've tried it all this past year, from calorie counting to eating Nutrisystem like food and nothing seems to be working, so I've decided to try WeightWatchers (WW). I signed up yesterday, and went to my first meeting as well as started the diet today. WW just revamped their program and it is now called PointsPlus and I think it's amazing. I'm still shocked by how much I ate today and I'm still under my points value. I hope and pray this is the answer to my prayers and I can start to lose weight. I plan on going to the gym 3 days a week as well as following the diet and this time I am so determined.

I know I'm going to have bad days and good days, and even bad weeks. I'm ready to take this battle on full force and ride the bull! I'm excited to be going to the meetings, it will give me a way to hold myself accountable, to meet other people who are doing this and to get informed about the program week by week.

I'm determined, I'm determined, I'm determined.